‘I've got your back': Waitress Pulls Sweet ‘Girl Power’ Move On Couple While They Dine Out for Dinner

Author image for Eleonora Bader
Eleonora Bader
Sep 26, 2023 4:00 PM EDT

Once upon a time, I was a server, waltzing to and fro, here and there, taking orders, bringing extra sauce, and sticking candles in the cake customers would bring on their birthdays. I will be honest, not a day goes by that I don't thank the heavens I'm not working in that industry anymore. Too many Karens and Kens out there that I simply do not have the patience for at this time. Towards the end, I was probably a pretty bad waitress, simply because I really despised the job.

One thing stands out to me in all my time working as a server though, and that is the dynamics between couples that I will never forget. As a woman, if I ever caught a whiff of something being off between couples, I would always do my best to show the woman I had her back. Apparently, the waitress in this story does, too. Scroll down to check out what happened.

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  • 01
    Font - Posted by u/Meep1996 1 day ago Had to explain to my date why our waitress only directed herself to me after he was the one to order and later request some soy sauce.
    via u/Meep1996
  • 02
    Font - I recently went out to eat with the guy I'm dating at a small restaurant that I'd never been too. Whenever we go out to eat if we're sharing he will order for both of us just because he's more talkative. This day was one of those times but it was basically all food I chose. I just nodded and said thanks while he
    via u/Meep1996
  • 03
    Font - ordered. We get our food and my date asked our waitress for some soy sauce and when she came back she only directed herself at me and only glanced at him even though I didn't ask for the soy sauce. While I noticed I didn't say anything until he leaned over and was like "don't you think it's weird
    via u/Meep1996
  • 04
    Font - she only directed herself to you?" Right away I explained saying "it's possibly because you ordered and I didn't say anything other than thanks and nodding. She might've thought you weren't letting me pick what to eat and made a girl power move to let me know she had my back if needed." Needless
    via u/Meep1996
  • 05
    Font - to say he was surprised and was like “but I wasn't doing that" (not upset just a little shocked) and I explained that he wasn't but the waitress didn't know that and that's just a way to let other women know we see what's happening and that it's not too uncommon for
    via u/Meep1996
  • 06
    Font - stuff like that to happen. Sometimes the situation just gets misread. As the night went on it seemed like she saw everything was fine but man I appreciated her so much!
    via u/Meep1996
  • 07
    Font - AYLAN thephoeniciangurl · 1 day ago I was a server for a while... I probably did stuff like this all the time without thinking. Sometimes, I just directed my attention to someone at the table because I liked them (not like like). I just felt like they were
    via u/thephoeniciangurl
  • 08
    Font - on my level and the other person wasn't. There is a weird dynamic sometimes, and I imagine it is over speculated at times. 3.0k Reply Share
    via u/thephoeniciangurl
  • 09
    Font - Meep1996 OP. 1 day ago Yeah it makes sense. I've done similar stuff too and I even thought about that in the moment but it was super obvious it was intentional. She actually started out facing him and even started
    via u/Meep1996
  • 10
    Font - talking to him but then switched to me and after that barely even glanced at him but when she did it was super quick. Like her whole body turned my direction. ↑ 735 Reply Share
    via u/Meep1996
  • 11
    Font - ewwwwwwwdavid · 1 day ago For what it's worth, as a server I learned years ago to look at the woman in a hetero couple, and mainly interact with her, lest she assume I'm flirting with her man. I've learned this because I've had it happen several times. It's stupid, it's dumb, it's an absurd fact of life. 4 1.2k Reply Share
    via u/Meep1996ewwwwwwwdavid
  • 12
    Font - Poppycake1903 - 1 day ago I was a server for decades and you are spot on with your observation. I remember tables like this and doing the same thing as your server because you don't know. 99 Reply Share
    via u/Poppycake1903
  • 13
    Font - Eacheremeant1978 · 1 day ago Waitress prob thought he was being a mansplainer. Happens all the time, girl. 203 Reply Share
    via u/Eacheremeant1978
  • 14
    Font - ilusnforc 10 hr. ago If I were him I would've ordered you a water then say "you know, what the hell. It's our anniversary Why don't you bring her a Pepsi.” Reply Share 4
    via u/ilusnforc
  • 15
    Font - Ketdogg 10 hr. ago Ive been a server/bartender for 27 years, she was absolutely telling you she had your back. Reply Share 6
    via u/Ketdogg
  • 16
    Font - athenakathleen · 21 hr. ago As a former server, I would do this because many women are...not comfortable with the man giving the waitress TOO MUCH attention. So, I would do this out of respect personally... Reply Share 7
    via u/athenakathleen
  • 17
    Font - Slooowdisco 11 hr. ago I'm currently a server, and have been for years now. I often do the same thing when interacting with couples who have this dynamic (and quieter members of parties in general). I want to make sure that I don't miss any cues from the less social person!
    via u/Slooowdisco
  • 18
    Font - Also since servers are often cast as being "flirtatious," I'll often focus more on the other woman in the couple (if I'm serving a cis- hetero couple) in order to show respect to the relationship so that she has no doubts that I'm not hitting on her man!
    via u/Slooowdisco
  • 19
    Font - Some weird work-arounds for sure! But I've found that people seem to be more at ease and happy when I feel the need to handle a table this way. Obviously it's not a one-size fits all move! 45 Reply Share
    via u/SlooowDisco
  • 20
    Font - quartzyquirky 18 hr. ago Maybe she forgot who asked for the sauce. Its so difficult to remember everything when things are busy. She might have just memorized the table number and requested item Reply Share 1
    via u/quartzyquirky

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